Wisdom and fun

After the waiter asked the Zen Monk how he wanted his coffee the Monk said: “Make me one with everything” … 

This page contains expressions that I ran into somewhere in life and are worth remembering. This way I hope they help to enlighten others as well.

 

Wisdom

  • If we have souls, they’re made of the love we share, undimmed by time, unbound by death.
  • The second you think you know all the answers is the second you fuck it all up – Mimi Macquire
  • It ain’t about where you’re from, it’s about where you’re at – Frank Gallagher
  • The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it
  • Your task is not to Seek for Love, but merely to seek and find All the barriers within yourself that You have Built against it – Rumi
  • Trust those who seek the truth, but doubt those who say that they have found it
  • It’s not what you see, it’s how you look at it – Gerard
  • Defeat Movement with Stillness
  • Tradition is the illusion of permanence
  • Move towards hope, don’t run from heartache
  • Work like you don’t need the money, love like you’ve never been hurt and dance like no one is watching . . .
  • She left this world a better place then she found it – DG
  • Tomorrow is going to be wonderful, because tonight I do not understand anything – Niels Bohr
  • We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars – Oscar Wilde
  • Sometimes we make the wrong choices to get to the right place – Movie: The equalizer

 

Fun

  • You dont need to be sober to shoot hoops – Lars
  • Who cares if it doesn’t do anything … It was made with our new Triple-Iso-Bifurcated-Krypton-Gate-MOS process
  • He stole from the rich … and kept everything for himself – Lorewalker Cho
  • It’s time for the revolution, there’s nothing to it. It sounds great, but I’m to stoned to do it.
  • If you pay peanuts you get monkeys – Frank G
  • WARNING PLEASE READ – I don’t usually re-post these but… If someone comes to your front door and asks you to remove your clothes and dance in your front yard with your arms in the air, DO NOT do this, it is a scam, they just want to see you naked. Please copy and paste this to your status — I wish I had received this yesterday, I feel so stupid now.
  • You’re a redneck when you think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk – FB
  • A new movie title: The farm – where man are men and sheep are nervous
  • Everyone who comes in here wants three things:
    (1) They want it quick.
    (2) They want it good.
    (3) They want it cheap.I tell ’em to pick two and call me back.
  • anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant…. – Jan J
  • It’s time to kick ass and chew buble gum … and I’m all out of gum – Duke Nukem
  • I had a wet dream once, I sleep walked into a swimming pool – Cashew
  • If it aint broke, fix it anyway!
  • Were you born stupid or do you have to work at it?
  • With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine
  • Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing.
  • The day Microsoft makes something that doesn’t suck is probably the day they start making vacuum cleaners.
  • A byte walks into a bar and orders a pint. Bartender asks him “What’s wrong?” Byte says “Parity error.” Bartender nods and says “Yeah, I thought you looked a bit off.”
  • This word is here for a reason and if you know why you can win a car .. Really! .. And the word is retardation.
  • Did you start working on this app on Talk Like a Pirate Day?
  • Q: What is christianity? A: It is the belief that a two- thousand-year-old jewish zombie can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him that you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat an apple off a magical tree in a wonderland.
  • Essence of MTV:  Hey everyone, we know you’ve all got the attention span of a squeaky fart, so here’s some flashing images and loud music.
  • If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 6 repeatedly.

If you want more fun reading material I suggest you try the Urban Dictionary.

 

Anecd … things

To small for a page, to big to be just an expression. Hence, in this section:

 

Believe it or not

C

ellulitis

Taoism: shit happens
Buddhism: if shit happens, it isn’t really shit
Islam: if shit happens, it is the will of Allah
Catholicism: if shit happens, you deserve it
Judaism: why does this shit always happen to us?
Atheism: I don’t believe this shit

— The Illustrated version —
believeitornot(click)

You wonder … 🙂